The Interview

Here we are, settled in suburbia!

It's been two weeks since we left Indonesia and it might as well have been two months. Coming home after a lengthy sojourn wraps you up in familiarity so completely it feels like maybe you just dreamed that two-year hiatus to the other side of the world.  

Didn't know what we were missing...

Of course, we've had moments of culture shock (the cereal aisle comes to mind). But it's hard to compete with the muscle memories of home base. You step onto American soil and it's stepping back into a glove that fits. Is there any Indonesia left in us at all? "Shoes off!" Announces Miles when we enter the house. The Asian imprint survives! 

But before we get in too deep here, we want to reflect on our time in that far-off place. We sat down with ourselves for this little exit-interview... 

What will you miss about Indonesia?

John: The curiosity and patience of Indonesians. And living a 90-minute flight from Bali.

Sarah: Affordable child care. I'm confounded that the United States can figure out how to avoid a war in the South China Sea but can't figure out affordable, accessible child care. I will miss it like crazy. That, and $9 foot massages. 

Who will you miss from Indonesia?
 
John: So many people! Perhaps most of all Water.org Country Director and dear friend Gusril Bahar and his lovely family.  

Head and shoulders: John with his team; Gusril is on his right.

Sarah: I second John's choice and also Gusril's wife, Carla, who makes the most amazing beef rendang. I will also miss our nanny, Larni. If zen came in the form of a human, it would be Larni. I will also miss my colleague Anita Kendrick whose 15+ years in Indonesia made life so much easier for us and who let Stanley swim laps in her pool. 

Zen Master Larni with her favorite Moyer

 What have you learned about yourself since moving to Indonesia?

John: That while I enjoy rice I can only eat a rice-based diet for a maximum of 21 consecutive days. Then I must binge on bread. 

Sarah: That I really like -- and might prefer -- tropical weather. I love a lotion-optional, shorts-all-the-time climate. I never have to check the weather. It's the same every day: 90 degrees and awesome. 

Recall a time you were shocked while living in Indonesia.  

John: When I got a driver's license without any test whatsoever. Nobody even confirmed that I could see.   

Sarah: When we discovered Waternbom. 44 million Indonesians do not have access to clean water. Apparently this is not a prerequisite for a state-of-the-art water park. 

Recall a time you were pleasantly surprised. 

John: When Sarah got into a car accident and our insurance deductible was $21. 

Sarah: When my mom and brother came to visit. I took them to the jungle and we had an awesome, very-Indonesian time. We had many amazing visitors - all of whom jumped right into our Indo life. Thanks to everyone who made the trek: Mom, Amos, Chris, John Sr., Angus, Natalie (twice!), Jon K (twice!), Sandy, Sara, Eric, Hank, Betty, Becca, and Marcus. And thanks to our dear friends Sean and Marisa who twice met us in other countries. 

Jungle cats for a weekend

 
Fill in the blank: I never thought I'd_____

John: I never thought I'd see my miniature dachshund turn into a cold-blooded rat hunter. I'm happy with the results. 

He strings their hides and wears their teeth

 
Sarah: I never thought that horseback riding would be my tropical hobby of choice.   

What is something you will not miss about Jakarta? 

John: The constant threat of mosquitoes carrying dengue fever. 

Sarah: Not being able to drink the tap water. Also, I will not miss giant cockroaches in my shower.

John, sum up Jakarta with a single image:

John:    

motorbike with duck saddle bags

In addition to family and friends, what are you most looking forward to about moving home?

John: Spring and Fall weather and watching live sports during waking hours. 

Sarah: Puh-lease, it's cheese.

What will for sure be in your grocery basket the first time you go shopping in the US?

John: Cheese, berries, ice cream, good IPA.

Sarah: What won't be in our basket? I'm concerned for how gangbusters that first trip will be.  (P.S. We went. It was a complete shit show.)

If you could go back two years and give yourselves a piece of advice as you boarded the flight for Jakarta, what would it be? 

John: Don't resist adopting batik shirts into your wardrobe. 

Don't resist, John. Even the U.S. ambassador wears batik.

 
Sarah: Don't waste time stressing about whether or not you'll ever have a career again. You will. 

What is something you never want to forget about your time in Indonesia? 

John: My son basically became a bilingual Indonesian child. 

He picked this out himself

 
Sarah: The inclusive nature of the ex-pat community. One of my favorite memories was Miles' first birthday party. We invited everyone we knew and had a BBQ. I remember looking around a full room and thinking, "8 months ago I didn't know a single person here." It was a really touching realization for me. You create community wherever you go and you carry that new community with you forever. I can't think of a more affirming reason to take a leap of faith.   

Sarah, anything you wished you'd blogged about?

Sarah: We barely scratched the surface. There are so many stories still to be told. We could probably write a chapter just about the things we ordered Gojek (Indonesia's Uber on a scooter) to do for us (not least of which was carry a stool sample to the doctor's office for testing). I never got around to detailing our trips to Korea, Australia or the Philippines. For that matter, I never got around to telling you about Stanley's near-death experience! Family came and went and we were busy living it; just didn't get to writing it. There is a documentary somewhere to be made on the entrepreneurial spirit of Indonesians, especially when it comes to inventing lines of business to circumvent traffic. I would have liked to document those, like the "jockeys" who stand at the entrance to the mandated carpool roads. You can pay them 20 cents to ride in the car so you meet the minimum body count. Imagine the stories there. I would love to get to the bottom of the thumb and pinky nail obsession that dominates certain circles of South East Asian men. Also I still have questions about their tendency toward mega stone rings. Don't get me started on Dengue Fever. In my head, I've written a featurette on my colleague Magda who is this sweet mom of a macro economist...until you find out she's also the ultimate coffee snob (do not bring her that Laotian coffee you picked up on your last trip and expect her to grind it in her grinder!). She ran a coffee trading business on the side (out of her filing cabinet, basically). You were no one until you were sourcing your beans from Magda. I became someone! I could fill a coffee table book with photos of my husband standing next to Indonesians looking like an NBA star. Did Stanley win hearts and minds? I think so; we could have done a better job of documenting it though. I took many photos of my hairdresser Essy and even took notes while in her chair for the essay I planned to write about her. Girl grows up in a village. Girl realizes cutting hair is a useful skill. Girl sees that English could give her an edge. Girl masters blond highlights. Girl puts it all together and becomes the savior of every wannabe blonde who moves to Jakarta. I also had a whole foray into rescuing animals. I know! I never mentioned it. Life was busy! But there was a kitten at one point ("Meow") and also a great dane. And then I got involved in various animal rescue organizations. Should we talk about the zoo? it's embarrassing how little attention this blog gave to the grocery store and the pharmacy - minefields of material the both of them. Did I ever mention our neighborhood monkey, Bonita? There are so many stories. Anyway, friends, now we tell the stories in person. Come visit. We are going to rock suburban life. And we have a finished basement with your names on it.